


Talk Like A Pirate Birthday

by DameRavnclaw



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hogwarts Era, Hogwarts First Year, International Talk Like A Pirate Day
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:00:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26119996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DameRavnclaw/pseuds/DameRavnclaw
Summary: Hermione learns Hogwarts isn't quite what she expected.Fred and George learn Muggle Culture is better than they expected.All come together and a friendship blooms.** First fic posted ***Blurbs are not my thing*Will follow Hermione and the Twins throughout Hogwarts, starting in Hermione's first year. Written to cover a single day each year - Hermione's birthday.
Kudos: 4





	Talk Like A Pirate Birthday

##### 19th September, 1991

##### 

Hermione sat alone in the common room. Normally, she would have been okay with this - well, not okay exactly, but she’d grown used to it throughout primary school. She had never had friends, her peers always thinking she was odd even before they really knew what that meant. She’d grown used to eating at the lunch tables in silence as conversations continued around her, without her. She’d grown used to spending break times on the bench near the playground with a book, watching the other children playing Stuck in the Mud or British Bulldog - unless it was raining, of course, then she would ask to stay inside with her book and watch them through the window. 

Every now and then, usually around the start of the year, teachers or other “helpful adults” would encourage her to play with the others. She would spend weeks awkwardly trying to make friends, which would inevitably end with teasing and, sometimes, hair pulling and kicking when her new teacher was relentless in her encouragement. 

It was at then that she’d first had a burst of accidental magic. One girl had been really mean. She had pushed Hermione over, grabbed her book, and thrown it in a puddle. Hermione had been heartbroken - it was the copy of Matilda her grandparents had given her a few weeks previously and she’d read it three times already. She had wished with all her heart that she could be like Matilda, that she could do magic and stop the bullies and make her book fly over the puddle like Amanda Thripp had flown over the fence. Oh how she had wished, with tears running down her face.

And … it happened. The book flew and the bullies all fell back like they had been pushed. Hard. Some of them started to cry and it was only then that the dinner ladies had noticed. The other children had said that she had pushed them all and, despite Hermione’s protests, the dinner ladies believed them. After all, she was fine and the others had grazes and wet clothes. She had been sent to the headmasters office and sent home, then told that she wasn’t allowed outside for playtime for the rest of term.

Hermione had readily agreed with her punishment. In later years, she will realise that the headmaster had been keeping her separate for her own benefit having had a number of conversations with the young and lonely little girl.

Since that event, the other children in her class refused to have anything to do with her. If there was any work to be done in pairs, children cried if they had to be paired with her. They were scared and her teachers couldn’t work out why - she was such a sweet little girl. Hermione became withdrawn and even when her favourite teacher brought her books in from home to read, she sat with her eyes down, silent.

Her parents were at a loss too. They’d tried child therapists, different afterschool clubs, they’d moved schools three times. Each change seemed to stress their usually quiet little girl out, so they stopped. They were in the middle of organising homeschooling her when, one evening, there was a knock at the door that changed their world entirely.

Hermione changed overnight. She no longer cared about not having friends. She was special. All the teasing and name calling seemed to bounce off her like rubber, baffling her teacher. Not only that, but she became obsessed with witches and wizards. Every non-uniform day they had, she would wear a witch's hat that she had made and brandish a wand made from a tube of paper. Whenever someone would call her weird, she would shrug and simply reply that she was special and they were not and that wasn’t her fault.

The summer holiday after she finished year 6 at primary school, Hermione practically vibrated with excitement about starting her new school. Finally - _finally_ \- she would be with people that would understand her. She’d be with people that were like her.

She’d have friends.

Two and a half weeks into her first term at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and she was heartbroken.

Nothing had changed. Nothing at all. She had thought being sorted into Gryffindor instead of Ravenclaw had been the right move - she’d persuaded the Sorting Hat to do so, though it didn’t take as much persuading as she had thought. In fact, all that had happened was her saying that was where she wanted to be and the Hat had agreed.

She had thought that being in a house that was meant to be chivalrous would mean they would be nice, but apparently no one told anyone in her year. The girls in her dormitory either teased her about her hair and bookishness, or completely ignored her. The boys were the same. So, once again, she had taken to sitting on her own at meal times or in the common room. Normally, she would have been okay with this - but not today.

Today was her birthday.

The first she’d ever had away from home.

Away from her family.

From her parents.

And she was alone.

At dinner, she had pocketed a treacle tart and taken it to the common room to eat on her own, using the fire that roared in the fireplace to light the ‘1’ and ‘2’ candles her parents had sent her this morning along with her gift - a brand new quill set she had no idea how they had gotten, and a first edition of Matilda. 

Sat alone in the common room, she sang Happy Birthday to herself and blew out the candles.

_Don’t forget to make a wish, sweetpea_ , her mother’s voice whispered through her mind.

She squeezed her eyes closed tight and wished with all her heart: _Please. I wish I had a friend. Please._

***

Fred and George were on a mission. They had just finished Muggle Studies and, after asking Professor Sterling for a random Muggle fact they could share with their dad, had discovered something amazing. So truly amazing that it changed everything. Nothing would ever be the same again.

How had they not known about this?!

Sure, they lived pretty far away from the Muggle village and they didn’t actually have anything to do with anyone that lived there - for the safety of the Muggles, their mum had said, pointing out all the experiments they did that walked the line between “perfectly fine” and “being arrested for Underage Magic Use” - but this? This was so big they _should_ have known.

“Do you think Dad knows?” Asked Fred.

“Probably. He’s obsessed with Muggles. He probably wanted to keep us away from it.” George replied.

Fred thought about it then retorted. “Nah, he doesn’t know. He’d be doing it himself and have researched anything else like it. It would drive Mum barmy. He definitely doesn’t know.”

George thought that over and nodded. “That makes sense, my slightly less attractive brother.”

Fred went to smack him around the head, but George dodged out the way and then they were at the Fat Lady. They had decided to drop their bags off before heading to the Great Hall and asking the first Muggleborn they saw to confirm what they had known. 

George had just stepped in through the portrait behind Fred when they both noticed a young girl - they were sure she was in Little Ronnikins’ year - sat on her own. That wasn’t really that unusual as they had seen her sat alone from the first day of term. What was unusual was the fact she was sitting with her eyes squeezed shut in front of a treacle tart.

Now, it wasn’t uncommon to find first years practicing bizarre magical practices or reciting poems in the hope that something spectacular would happen. In fact, Fred and George actively encouraged it, having persuaded a young Irish boy to try turning his drink into alcohol only a few days previously, but this one was new. 

They had to know what it was meant to do.

For ... research purposes.

And they would swear to that in front of McGonagall herself!

Well, maybe not the big McG. Perhaps Snape. It was always fun to see him lose his cool.

Both Fred and George dropped onto the sofa either side of the young girl, startling a quiet squeak from her. Her head whipped back and forth, giving each twin a mouthful of hair that was more curly than it had any right to be. 

With a grin, they spoke in unison, “Hello little firstie!”

“Here we were…” Fred continued.

George took up the sentence, “... Minding our own business.” 

“About to drop our bags off after a hard day.”

“And then we come in to spy you trying some new magic.”

“Which is completely against the rules,” Fred said as George shook his head, a look of dramatic disappointment on both their faces.

“So we have no choice but to ask…” George continued, before they both finished in unison: 

“What does it do?”

The young girl - Hannah? - who had been turning her head in order to keep up with the conversation, looked between them in utter bewilderment. “Magic? What are you on about? I was blowing out my candles. Do purebloods not blow out candles on their birthday?”

There was a hesitancy in her voice that pulled at Fred slightly, and both twins turned to look at the treacle tart. Sure enough, there were two half-burned candles that had made the number “ _12_ ”. 

“Of course we do!” George said with a grin.

“But we normally do it on a cake.”

“And with our friends”

“Well that’s hard to do,” Hermione said, the anger in her voice barely masking the upset, “when you don’t _have_ friends.”

Fred and George shared a look over her head. They had both noticed her sat on her own, but they hadn’t realised that she had no friends. Not only that, but judging from her previous question, she was half-blood at least, but both would have been willing to bet she was muggle born. Which meant she was on her own in a new place, a new world, with no one to talk to. They knew from experience how hard that was and they had known it was going to happen all their lives. And they had each other and their parents, but if she was a muggleborn … Her parents wouldn’t understand. 

And then, as if a candle had been lit above their head, their expressions changed.

“Say, are you Muggleborn by any chance?” George asked.

The first year bristled immediately. “Yes, I am, what does that matter?!”

“Wooooah calm down, it doesn’t matter at all!” George said quickly.

Fred hastened to add, “Not at all, and don’t you ever believe anyone that says otherwise.”

“Buuuuuut… We do have a question for you.”

The young girl took a breath and nodded. “Okay, ask your question.”

In unison, both asked, “Is it _really_ Talk Like A Pirate Day today?”

She stared at them both then burst out laughing. “ _That’s_ your question?” They nodded. “Fine, okay. Yes, it is. In my last school, everyone used to dress up as pirates and the teachers taught with a pirate voice all day. One teacher brought in a parrot.”

Fred and George’s eyes lit up. It was true.

It was better than true.

There were _parrots_. 

It was too late to do anything about it this year, but it sounded like it happened every year like they had hoped. Still, they had better confirm…

“And this happens every year?” Fred asked.

The young girl nodded. “Yep, every year on my birthday.”

The twins could barely contain their excitement. 

“Well then, it seems like you’ve got yourself two friends.”

“The very best friends.”

“The most attractive and best of friends.”

“You’re incredibly lucky to have us.”

She frowned. “And what do you want in return?”

George’s heart broke at the question. “Want? Nothing.”

“We’d love to know more about Talk Like A Pirate Day but that’s not a requirement…”

She nodded, thinking it over. After a minute or so of silence, she said “Okay, that seems fair.”

“Fantastic. I’m Fred.”

“And I’m George.”

“Hermione, pleased to meet you.” She stuck out her hand to shake theirs, which both of them did with a laugh. 

“Well Hermione,” Fred said with a grin, pulling the treacle tart towards them. 

George cut it into three before handing each of them a slice, saying, “Welcome to the club.”

“Happy birthday!” They said in unison, then scoffed their slice of tart in one bite as Hermione ate hers delicately. 

Once they were all done, the twins sat back with a satisfied grin. The three of them sat in silence, only slightly uncomfortable, until Fred let out a mighty “ARRRRRRR!”

Hermione giggled, so George did the same, elbowing her in the ribs until she was breathless with laughter. 

It only took a moment of persuasion before they convinced her to join in.

***

In the corridor outside, Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley walked up to the portrait of the Fat Lady, thoroughly confused by the loud laughter and shouts of “ARRRRRR!” coming through the canvas door. 


End file.
